- October 9, 2000 at 12:00 am #10648
My boyfriend is dying to try anal sex, though when I’ve tried it in the past (with a previous partner) it hurt. How do you get by the pain and also the feeling of needing to use the washroom?
User Detail :Name : Katie26701, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Jewish, Age : 29, City : Toronto, Ontario, State : NA Country : Canada, Occupation : Sales/Marketing, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, October 16, 2000 at 12:00 am #32659
I might not be the most qualified person to answer, but I’ve asked before myself, and this is what I learned: 1) This is a multi-step process. Don’t expect a pleasurable experience right away. 2) Make sure you have both been tested for sexually transmitted diseases. The tissue in the anal cavity is more fragile than vaginal tissue and easily torn, making transmission much easier. 3) Vaginal sex was also uncomfortable the first time, right? You got past it, likely by taking your time, hopefully with a sensitive and patient partner. These same basic ingredients are necessary for anal sex, too. Be sure you are as interested in trying it as he. Reluctance contributes tension, which contributes to tight muscles, which contributes to more pain than there might be otherwise. If you really don’t want to, please don’t . It’s OK to say no. Talk about it with him, and be sure he understands your concerns and is supportive. 4) Start with some gentle play in the area, so that you are comfortable being touched there. This part should be pursued without the expectation that anal sex will follow immediately. No pressure. If you feel ready, allow your boyfriend to use a well-lubricated finger to gently probe inside, little by little. When you reach your pain threshhold, he stops. You can try again on other occasions. 5) You might want to try an anal plug. These can be purchased at any sex-toy store, from the internet, or mail-order. They come in different sizes, from relatively thin on up. They are usually tapered at the insertion end, and widen slightly. Ease this in, again with lots of lubrication (Aqua Lube is good), and wear it for a few minutes, or as long as it feels comfortable. Try the gentle fingering again. Once you are able to take a whole finger, tell him to freeze, and give yourself a while to relax. 6) Once you feel comfortable with a finger, allow him to gently try inserting his penis. If it hurts, tell him to stop pushing, and let yourself relax around it. Let him proceed only if you’re ready. It’s likely to be uncomfortable for a while, but it shouldn’t hurt nearly as much. You might want to give yourself an enema beforehand if you’re worried about poop. Soon he will be able to insert his whole penis, but without thrusting. Work up to very shallow, very slow movement. Then, whatever you feel comfortable with.
User Detail :Name : Jennifer R., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Humanist, Age : 29, City : Saint Paul, State : MN Country : United States, Occupation : Writer/Student, Education level : 4 Years of College, Social class : Middle class, October 16, 2000 at 12:00 am #33300
First, you and your partner must agree that this is something you both would like to explore. Second, your partner must stop this act immediately if you say stop. Now, with that stated, you must relax and think of the pleasure to come. Make sure you use plenty of lubricant, on his penis and your anus. Your partner must start off slowly. As he inserts himself, you must relax your anus muscle. Eventually he will have full penetration.
User Detail :Name : KL, City : Detroit, State : MI Country : United States, November 30, 2000 at 12:00 am #16118
MOST OF THE TIME ASSERTING VASELINE UPON THE PENIS MAKES THE SEX MORE COMFORTABLE.
User Detail :Name : Debbie Williams, Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Straight, Race : Black/African American, Religion : Christian, Age : 18, City : Miami, State : FL Country : United States, Education level : High School Diploma, Social class : Middle class,
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