Reply To: Why hate “Fag Hags”?

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Mandy O.

I don’t hate ‘fag hags’. I do, however, dislike some of the ideas about gay men that they have. To me at least, it seems as though straight women who identify themselves as ‘fag hags’ are secretly in love with their gay male friend. Although it doesn’t really seem like a secret. They expect to somehow change their friend’s sexual orientation, which in essence shows that they can’t accept the fact that their friend is gay. On the other hand, other ‘fag hags’ seek gay men to engage in a very close friendship much like a relationship, minus sex. I have heard them firsthand say things like ‘He’s like a boyfriend that has the same interests as me, except I don’t have to have sex with him.’ Or, ‘They say diamonds are a girl’s best friend…I say a gay man is a girl’s best friend.’ To ‘fag hags,’ gay men are a novelty. I’ve also noticed that many ‘fag hags’ have a prejudice against lesbians, which reinforces the idea that they’re not totally accepting of all gays.

A friend of a friend is a ‘fag hag’ who is getting married to a closeted gay man. The guy says he thinks his sexual urges toward men will vanish if he is married to a woman. I also need to mention that the ‘fag hag’ I’m talking about has a circle of friends entirely made up of gay men, and has actually asked one of them to ‘turn straight’ for her, and if he does then she will call off the wedding. I have another gay male friend who isn’t allowed to go out with his boyfriend without getting the third degree from his ‘fag hag’. She has said things to her gay friend such as ‘Why would you rather go out with him than me?’ I don’t like how these women try to control gay men.

I can, however, in another sense, appreciate straight women befriending gay men. Never in history has a minority gained acceptance without help from members of the majority. I think that’s as much credit I can give them, though.

User Detail :  

Name : Mandy O., Gender : F, Sexual Orientation : Lesbian, Race : White/Caucasian, Religion : Atheist, Age : 20, City : Newton, State : MA Country : United States, Occupation : Political Science Student, Education level : 2 Years of College, Social class : Upper middle class,